Marilyn Monroe Does the Rude Thing; Light-fingered Louie Day

Marilyn asked me to get a few items for her personal purchase, with not a single please or thank you ever uttered. Was she raised in a barn, or by people that didn't care?

Several shoplifters were discovered and chased today. Someone speculated that it was because of the pressure of tax time. Also, paper bag requests seemed to be up. To me, this is a sign that something is up, but I don't know what.

Staterback Mountain

"Pretty Boy Floyd was in the employee lounge, and was about to put a large, plump weiner (in a bun) in his mouth.

"I prayed for a camera.

"--Cowboy Bill"

The Mayan Dowager's Tale

Homer doesn't like to do carts, so he comes in frequently when it's his turn. While bagging at a checkstand, when he sees a large order coming down the belt, he announces he has to go outside to do carts, and immediately walks off.

Me and Mrs. Magoo

"Is the lot clear?" I was asked.
"No," I answered, "there were too many carts for me to do, and the lot started out messy"
"Well, you should have told me there was a problem. Now, go out and clear the lot." (Which I did.)

What's wrong with this picture?: The messenger was being punished for the bad news. I take some minor responsibility for not informing Mrs. Magoo about the problem, but it's not my fault I can't do more than several hundred carts an hour (no exaggeration.) To say I was mildly irritated is understatement. Comments?

Going Postal

An (ex) co-worker lost it the other day. Didn't know him real well, except that he was well-spoken and didn't like his job very much.

For what it's worth, my prayers are with him.


[A leaflet with photo posted at the store today:]

Missing Person
Sergio Escobedo
Is on medication and doesn't know who he is.
His mom is looking for him.
Contact Patty (714)xxx-9523 or Jose (714)yyy-5573

(Please contact me if you need to speak to either of the above people.)

NB: checked with one of the above numbers on 4/26, and was told that Sergio has been found.

Bits & Pieces

Best one liner (said by a middle aged gentleman, looking about at the current young crew): Did they get rid of all the old people?
Footnote to above: Ed S points out that maybe he was referring to experience, which makes it less funny.

Hottest gossip: something's in the oven.

Happy Birthday!